Feeling

im feeling not too good right now.. even though i'm dismissed on monday at 1.20, ideally cancelling my double PW lessons and econs tutorial... its quite sad.. i dunno why... reading other people's blog reminded me of a question someone asked me today...

why are u so matured -.- .. eh such a weird question to ask.. how am i supposed to answer? .. sigh.. im guessing its just cause im the eldest in the family.. the eldest male amongst all my cousins.. making me the one to make all the decisions.. somewhat.. im forced to be matured.. nurtured by circumstances.. not my choice... nth much i could do about that anyway...

people at my age are still fooling around.. understanding life.. but for me.. i have to learn how to mediate and calm my mum down.. preventing another major scolding session for my bro.. due to some spastic ___ ... i shall not continue.. it's adult matters.. but somehow i should step in.. to prevent my grandparents from being exploited.. cant stand the sight of them.. just wish they could get the F*** out of my life..

i have this weird feeling for someone... perhaps.. i dunno.. its just this funny warm fuzzy(?) feeling.. just want to see her happy i guess... when she's sad i'll feel down... many distractions around the place.. but when she's in my sight.. im oblivion to my surroundings.. dunno how she thinks about me though... perhaps.. perhaps.. time will tell.. i hope..

haha zhengjun... im in no position to give u much advice as to how to help u lor... cause im not into this type of relationship before...well at least not yet.. but im afraid i cant cope.. dunno wad to do now ... dun wanna jeopardise my studies.... but i dunno if i should really consult anybody.. furthermore... its could be one sided... maybe she treats me like a friend.. a friend it would be.. just stay happy...